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Scott officials prefer to 'do nothing' with parking barriers

Wednesday, Oct. 9, 2013, 9:00 p.m.

Officials in Scott are still searching for ways to appease residents who say newly installed parking barriers in the township are a little too phallic-shaped, but a national animal rights group might have an answer.

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals has sent a letter to the township offering to pay for part of the flattening of the top of the pillars, known as bollards, through an advertising campaign.

The group would help pay for the flattening by renting space on the bollards for pro-vegan, anti-impotence advertisements reading “Here's a tip: Go vegan to beat impotence! PETA.”

“Vegans are far less likely than meat-eaters to suffer from heart disease, diabetes and obesity, each of which is a major cause of erectile dysfunction,” PETA executive director Tracy Reiman wrote in an Oct. 3 letter to township manager Denise Fitzgerald. “And by avoiding the cholesterol and saturated animal fat found in meat, dairy products and eggs, men can keep blood flowing to all their organs.”

Township commissioner William Wells hadn't heard of the proposal Friday afternoon.

“I've never heard of anything so ridiculous,” Wells said. “I think we'd be better to just leave them alone.”

Some township residents brought concerns to officials at the Sept. 24 commissioners meeting, saying the bollards were offensively shaped. One resident told commissioners at the meeting that people are calling it “Penis Road.”

Township commissioner Pat Caruso said the answer is simple: Do nothing.

“I think it's really much to do about nothing, I really do,” she said. “I hope we won't have any further discussion about it.”

The story of the phallic-shaped bollards has taken off since then, with the story being featured on late-night comedy talk show “Jimmy Kimmel Live” last week.

Four bollards were installed at a bus stop in front of St. Ignatius Church on Finley Street. Six more were placed on Carothers near Magazine Street.

Officials are unsure what — if anything — they should do.

“I can't imagine we would change them,” Caruso said last Thursday, noting the commissioners had not met since Martin brought her concerns to the board. “If we did that, we'd be spending taxpayer money. That doesn't make sense.”

The bollards are part of a revitalization project involving Scott, Carnegie and Heidelberg, though the barriers are wholly in Scott.

Megan Guza is a staff writer for Trib Total Media. She can be reached at 412-388-5810 or

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