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The Way I See It: Grown-ups know what real BFFs are supposed to be

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Wednesday, Nov. 13, 2013, 12:01 a.m.

My daughter has been going through some pretty rough stuff lately. It's nothing all of us haven't experienced, mind you, but to her, some days it feels like it's the end of the world.

What my 17-year-old is facing — among other normalcies of being that angst-ridden age — is the harsh reality that friendships can hurt.

Don't get me wrong. She has some amazing girlfriends; I don't know what either one of us would do without them. But some young people don't know themselves, much less how to treat one another.

My husband and I have tried to explain to her that the best friends she'll have won't come until much later, but most telling to her, we hope, is the close bond he and I have with our dearest friends.

Let's just call them Mr. and Mrs. Wonderful of Imperial.

My husband knew these two long before I did, but when I had the pleasure of meeting them what now seems like a lifetime ago, I knew right away that they were special.

You see, they know how to treat people. They know that through real caring, understanding and appreciation for someone's true nature, a friendship can be nurtured and, yes, even can last.

My best times in life — aside from milestones with my husband and daughter — have been a direct result of their friendship.

We've celebrated together, laughed together, spent summer days by their pool. We've vacationed, picnicked, spent holidays and landmark birthdays with each other, applauded each other's achievements and set each other straight when we should.

We've gone through some pretty big scares together, hardships and obstacles life threw in our paths — together.

And through it all, our bond only has grown stronger, with no worries about gossip, backstabbing, lack of trust or dwindling respect. When it comes down to it, we simply like each other.

Those kind of friendships require much more than late-night chat sessions on the cell, hallway gossip between class and tears over a boy another girl stole away. Those kinds of friendships require time — and an understanding of what really matters.

So take heed, daughter, this too shall pass — and one day down the road you choose to follow, your Mrs. Wonderful will be there for you every step of the way. Until then, you've always got me.

Mya L. Koch is news editor of the Sewickley Herald. Reach her at

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