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Presidential messages to Trump

| Saturday, Nov. 4, 2017, 10:00 p.m.

Last night I heard messages from past presidents, all grateful to Trump:

Nixon: “Thanks, Donald, for removing me from the top of the ‘most paranoid presidents' list. Compared to your daily rants, my enemies' list is child's play and the Saturday Night Massacre looks like a Sunday picnic. Now even die-hard Democrats view me as a voice of reason.”

Lyndon Johnson: “Finally someone comes along who matches my Texas-size ego. I don't like your politics, boy, but your foul mouth trumps mine every time. You make my temper tantrums sound downright diplomatic.”

Harding: “I admitted I was ‘not fit' for the presidency and my speeches were incomprehensible, but they included words with multiple syllables and real sentences. I'm looking more and more like a Rhodes scholar!”

Eisenhower: “Folks complained I spent too much time on the golf course. But I treated the press and public with respect. Plus I expressed a less-than-stellar opinion on nuclear war. My stock went way up when you took office!”

Buchanan: “Hey, I just want to tip my hat to you for bumping me off the bottom of all those ‘worst presidents' lists.”

There was one sobering exception among the kudos:

Washington: “Mr. Trump, you just made King George III look a lot less mad. It pains me to say this but if I had known that all the sacrifices and struggles would lead to this, to you , I may have switched sides.”

Leslie J. Miller

Squirrel Hill

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