By Tribune-Review

Published: Saturday, December 22, 2012, 8:56 p.m.
Updated: Wednesday, December 26, 2012

With Christmas nearly upon us, it behooves us to ask a certain rotund gentleman with a North Pole address to consider these suggestions when loading presents onto his sleigh for his whirlwind world tour:

• For Gov. Tom Corbett — A large “For Sale” sign that he hopefully will be able to put on the state liquor store system in the coming year.

• For Pittsburgh Mayor Luke Ravenstahl — A bed large enough to accommodate him and the nearly 600 members of the city firefighters union.

• For Pittsburgh City Councilman Bill Peduto — A Wiz Khalifa T-shirt that the Democrat mayoral candidate can wear to remind voters it was his idea to honor the pot-smoking rap star when he appeared in town for a Dec. 12 concert.

• For Steelers President Art Rooney II — The gift he wants most — another 3,000 seats at Heinz Field — because those grinches at the Sports & Exhibition Authority won't give it to him.

• For Tom Cruise — A case of Iron City Beer, a Steelers sweatshirt and a Primanti Bros. gift card, because during his recent appearance on David Letterman 's show, he talked up Pittsburgh, where he filmed his new movie, “Jack Reacher.”

• For PNC Chairman Jim Rohr — The Norton Deluxe Computer Security Suite, to help ward off cyber attacks that have plagued Pennsylvania's largest bank.

• For former Highmark CEO Ken Melani — A pair of boxing gloves, so he won't have to worry about possibly injuring his hands should he ever get into another fight with his mistress's husband.

• For former state Rep. Bill DeWeese of Waynesburg and former state Sen. Jane Orie of McCandless, both imprisoned — Any 16-month calendar whose expiration will signal their eligibility for parole. Cute puppy calendars certainly would liven up the ol' cells.

• For Penn State President Rodney Erickson — Nothing; Santa should skip his house, as he can afford to buy himself most anything he wants after just getting an $85,000 pay raise, retroactive to Nov. 1, that boosts his annual salary to $600,000.

• For former Pittsburgh City Council aide Matt Hogue — So he won't be tempted to steal any more city-owned chainsaws, a Poulan Pro 50-cc, 2-cycle, 18-inch model he can call his own.

• For Allegheny County Presid ent Judge Donna Jo McDaniel — A gift certificate for a free family portrait sitting. Perhaps the photo could be taken at the county courthouse — where, curiously enough, an assortment of her family members happens to work.

• For Allegheny County Controller Chelsa Wagner — The lump of coal she deserves after wangling a 35-percent raise for herself immediately after assuming office in January by claiming nine years' worth of retroactive controller cost-of-living increases.

• For Pirates owner Bob Nutting — Full-body riot gea r — s omething that could come in handy if the Pirates suffer their 21st consecutive losing season next year.

Merry Christmas, everyone.

RETIRED BUT STILL SLEUTHING.Paul DeStefano of Latrobe, who recently retired as a state police lieutenant, has joined the law firm of Edgar Snyder & Associates as its investigations manager.

DeStafano retired after 27 years of state-police service, most recently working out of Troop A in Greensburg.

He had served as station commander at the Pittsburgh, Kiski Valley and Indiana stations and was a supervisor on the FBI Joint Terrorism Task Force after 9/11. He also was western section commander of the state police Bureau of Criminal Investigation's drug law division and organized crime supervisor.

REUNITED. Democrats Dave Codor and Pam Snyder, who formerly served together as Greene County commissioners, will soon be reunited.

After Mark Critz of Johnstown became a U.S. representative, taking over the late John Murtha's House seat, Codor quit to work for the congressman.

In November, Snyder was elected to Bill DeWeese's former seat in the state House and Critz lost his re-election bid. Codor faced being without a job.

But not for long. Snyder has hired Codor for her staff.

— compiled by Tribune-Review staff

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