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Bush twins' online chat could be entertaining

| Friday, July 23, 2004

Today is the day to talk to the twins.

Fraternal first twins Barbara and Jenna Bush -- previously best known for their hard-partying exploits that earned them nicknames such as "Barb and Wired" and "Jen and Tonic" -- will conduct an online chat with America.

Fresh from a Vogue magazine cover shoot, the pair are now on the campaign trail stumping for their father, George W. Bush. They will detour from their bus tour through America's heartland this afternoon to answer queries from the curious at the president's campaign Web site, www.georgebush.com.

To their credit, the young ladies didn't duck the questions posed to them by Vogue, although they largely involved fashion. Still, one suspects the online chat monitor today will let them take a swing only at the slowest of softballs tossed their way:

Here's how things might go:

Question: Jenna, Barbara, hi. Did the Calvin Klein and Oscar de la Renta gowns you wore for the Vogue cover itch at all• The nation wants to know.

Jenna: The gowns didn't really itch, but we looked like cupcakes. My mother even said so.

Barbara : Remember, everyone, get out and vote for my dad, George, Bush, on Election Day!

Q: Good afternoon. Could one of you provide a personal anecdote illustrating for the nation President Bush's resolve on the war on terror?

Jenna: What a coincidence, I was just asked that question during a campaign stop in Columbus the other day. Sure, I have an amusing anecdote. We were at a baseball game once on a hot day, and I couldn't convince him to leave -- even after practically mummifying myself with wet paper towels!

Barbara : Talk about steely determination! The terrorists don't have a chance. How could you not get out and vote for my dad, George Bush, on Election Day?

Expect the chat participants to go fairly easy on the first twins -- unless the moderator is momentarily distracted or has to take an emergency bathroom break. If that happens, all bets are off.

Q: Ladies, after being shielded from the public eye for most of your father's first term, does it bother you that you are now being carted out like circus seals to improve his re-election chances?

Barbara: How did this question get through?

Jenna (following an extremely lengthy pause): Just like I did to all the reporters and photographers following us around the other day, I stuck out my tongue at you. But I stopped when Barbs told me you couldn't see it because we're online.

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