Event in North Park celebrates lives lost to cancer

In November, Paul McDonnell lost his wife of 30 years, Terri, to pancreatic cancer.

“We did hospice at home, and I didn’t do any support groups when she was sick,” he recalled. “There was too much care that had to be given.”

After Terri’s passing, he took the suggestion of her social worker and contacted Pittsburgh nonprofit Cancer Bridges, which offers a variety of free programs and services. Paul then decided to join the group’s 10-week Moving Through Grief series.

“It was a phenomenal course,” the Squirrel Hill resident said. “The way they were teaching us to manage our grief or get through the grief was utilizing the most current scientific methods that are in practice today.”

The series of virtual sessions, led by licensed clinical social workers Wendy Myers and Trish Campbell, culminated with a Celebration of Light on May 6 in North Park.

“It’s always such a neat thing when people see each other in person here, because they’ve only really seen each other on the screen up until this evening,” Myers said, and plenty of hugging generally takes place.

The Celebration of Light started in the fall of 2020, as covid-era restrictions started to ease, and is held twice a year as a wrapup to Moving Through Grief.

About 40 members of nine families participated this month, including a dozen children. The highlight was an activity in which they decorated lanterns with remembrances of their loved ones.

“Inside, we’re going to put a candle, and that’s the love that shines through,” therapeutic artist Brant Meehan explained.

Once illuminated, the lanterns were launched onto the water’s surface, to be retrieved later so that participants could take them home as keepsakes.

Youngsters — adults, too — had the further opportunity to make memory bracelets “as a way to remember and honor your loved one through a tangible object,” according to Cancer Bridges family and youth program coordinator Leah Frank.

Another keepsake was a memory book compiled with photos and fond recollections submitted by members of each Moving Through Grief family.

Myers, Cancer Bridges’ senior clinical manager, said that participants generally come a long way during the series.

“It’s really amazing to see where people are in the beginning of the grief classes, how sad they are and how lost they are,” she said. “Then each session, they learn something about their grief journey, and by the 10th, they’re very bonded. They stay connected even after this evening.”

The next round of Moving Through Grief starts in June.

“People really struggle, and the healing part of this is to be able to share your feelings and thoughts,” Myers said. “That’s how you move through your grief.”

Paul McDonnell agreed.

“The group therapy was really beneficial because I was able to see that other people are experiencing the exact same things I am,” he said. “They instilled a sense of hope, and they confirmed that everything I’m feeling is completely normal and that I’ll never forget my wife, but I’ll get through these feelings.”

For more information about programs and services offered by Cancer Bridges, visit cancerbridges.org and www.facebook.com/CancerBridgesPgh.