Laurels & lances: Cows, comments, alcohol and ashes

Laurel: To those on the hunt for crafty cows. The Westmoreland County Animal Response Team has the unenviable task of trying to track down a small herd of cattle that have been roaming southern Murrysville since at least April 26, when a Murrysville resident snapped a photo as he followed them down School Road South.

It might seem like a loose cow would be easy to spot, but so far they’ve proved elusive. Kudos to anyone with the know-how and ability to try and round ’em up!

Lance: To the Highlands School District — again. The school board has scheduled a public meeting of its transportation committee next week and — begin scratching your head here — they will not allow the public to comment. Imagine that, a public meeting to talk about how the district is spending your money and you won’t have a chance to say a word.

The Pennsylvania NewsMedia Association says the state’s Sunshine Act clearly allows the public to comment and ask questions at all public meetings. Frankly, this is not rocket science: The taxpayer’s money. The taxpayer’s right to ask about it. Period.

Laurel: To the toast of a new town. Could New Kensington use a beer? Maybe it could really use a brew pub. Meadville’s Voodoo Brewery is planning to open one this fall. While the brewery’s owners think it will be a “challenging cool project” for a “community on the rise,” Mayor Tom Guzzo sees a catalyst for revitalizing New Kensington’s downtown. Here’s to hoping the endeavor gets the support it needs from Voodoo fans and locals alike.

Lance: To family devalued. A Beechview man is facing charges after police say a falling-out with his McKeesport mother prompted a horrifying response. Thomas Porter Wells allegedly took his grandparents’ ashes from a memorial in his mother’s bedroom and flushed them down the toilet. He faces two counts of abuse of a corpse and one of criminal mischief.

“Mischief” seems like an insufficient word for such action. There are plenty of puns we could use to make light of what begs for bathroom humor, but readers were right when they called it no laughing matter.