U mad, bro?: Fans agitated over too much early Pirates hype, too much heat on Mike Sullivan, too many dirty NHL hits

OK, so maybe we took the Steelers’ draft-night conspiracies a little far. I don’t think so. But some of you do.

Maybe, just maybe, we started talking up the Pirates too much before the Rays stomped them down.

And perhaps the NHL playoffs have degenerated into “West Side Story” gang warfare.

Well, that’s why we invented “U mad, bro?” in the first place.

On draft night, I suggested that the Patriots got a little extra enjoyment out of trading pick No. 14 to the Steelers so they could select Broderick Jones before the New York Jets could.

This Jets fan disagreed with that assessment.

Jets weren’t taking Broderick Jones.

— Jets Fanguy (@JetsFanGye) April 28, 2023

Oh. So they were always going to take Will McDonald IV? They were always going to reach for a guy who went 10-15 spots higher than he was projected without trading back?

OK. I take it back then. Great strategy.

You may have seen Winnipeg Jets coach Rick Bowness shred his players for their lack of “pushback” during a 4-1 series loss to the Vegas Golden Knights.

Jets head coach Rick Bowness “disgusted” by the play of his top players as he unloads after his team is eliminated in five games by Vegas pic.twitter.com/MtDtaTKEMS

— Joe Pascucci (@Pascucci015) April 28, 2023

My response on Twitter was that his undressing of the club was a lot more substantial than Mike Sullivan’s constant refrain of “we had too much volatility in our game” to explain why the Penguins missed the playoffs.

A follower named Andy had this response.

Rick is rarely mistaken for Scotty bowman.

— Andy Plowsher (@andyplowsher) April 28, 2023

Fair point. Unfortunately, the last five years of Mike Sullivan’s tenure may be mistaken for the last five years of Dan Bylsma’s.

Actually, come to think of it, the last five years of Bylsma’s were better.

This emailer, Mark, is disgusted by the frequency of dirty hits in the NHL playoffs this year.

“The NHL continues to operate as though Don Cherry never left. The shrugging off of the latest neck injury to Andrew Cogliano as ‘just another hockey play’ shows the league’s absolute blindness to the consequences of its skimpy and mostly unenforced safety policies… My immediate recommendation is that ANY boarding call is automatically a five-minute major and game misconduct. If refs are strongly instructed to mercilessly call them, this dangerous play will vanish from the ice.”

Conceptually, I don’t have a problem with that. I worry about two things, though.

1. If such a rule were to be put in place, I bet the refs would deem the punishment “too punitive” in their own minds and suddenly 50-50 boarding calls would only get called 40% of the time.

2. A lot of players who consider themselves tough guys in the corners may find themselves suddenly going down a lot easier at the slightest touch to their back.

You think players embellish now? If that rule goes on the books the way you outlined, you’ll practically see players throwing themselves into boards like they were being cross-checked by Casper the Not-So-Friendly Ghost.

Or do I mean Kaspar the Not-So-Friendly Ghost?

Speaking of which, when Jacob Trouba leveled Timo Meier in Game 7 of the Rangers-Devils series Monday, I sent out some tweets that were critical of the NHL for seemingly having a different threshold of acceptance for big hits from Trouba than they do anyone else.

No one in any sport is allowed to hit anyone hard, especially above the rib cage. But Jacob Trouba can hit anyone he wants, whenever and wherever he wants. It's unreal.

— Tim Benz (@TimBenzPGH) May 2, 2023

“Steel Citi Kid” sees it differently.

Playoffs are different, enough with the high and mighty stance. All hockey fans want to see hits like that from time to time

— Degenerate Gambler (@SteelCitiKidi) May 2, 2023

You know what? So do I. I’m not ashamed to say it. Physicality is part of the NHL and NFL. It shouldn’t be legislated out.

My argument is, they never hold Trouba to the same standard as everybody else in hockey. I don’t have a problem with the big hits, in theory. But the NHL pretends to have a problem with them. Until it’s Trouba doing the hitting.

Then suddenly, it’s OK. Anyone else and that’s at least a penalty. Probably an ejection. And maybe a suspension.

For Trouba, it’s another highlight.

Finally, the headline for my column on Tuesday in advance of the Pirates-Rays showdown was “The series we all predicted could be a World Series preview.”

Rich may have taken that … a little too seriously.

“World Series preview? What are you smoking/ingesting? The Pirates, with a great start and apparently improved, are obviously still a fatally-flawed team.”

Didn’t we have this problem at the end of “U mad, bro?” last week too?

Rare have been the times in my career — and my life — when my sarcasm has been accused of being too … um … subtle.

Maybe it’s time for me to start developing that “sartalics” font I keep threatening to invent.